


Stupidity isn't contagious, is it?

by ximeria



Series: 2014 Fic-A-Week (all the XMFC AUs) [25]
Category: X-Men: First Class (2011) - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Still Have Powers, Crack, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-22
Updated: 2014-06-22
Packaged: 2018-02-05 19:15:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1829230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ximeria/pseuds/ximeria
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Note to Erik Lehnsherr: Don't piss off the telepath that Emma wants you to recruit for the sake of Genosha's future. He'll get his own back, just wait and see.</p><p>In which Erik Lehnsherr is his usual asshole self and Charles has a mean streak a mile wide.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stupidity isn't contagious, is it?

**Author's Note:**

> This is not a deep and meaningful story. Sorry about that. After last week's rather dark plot bunny (dark for me, anyway), I needed something cracky to carry on with.

Charles was enjoying himself. It was Saturday night and he'd made sure to have nothing to grade for Monday, allowing him to have fun all weekend long. He needed it. He'd worked hard to free up this weekend for himself. Mostly because the past few weeks had held nothing but failed experiments, all night sessions in the lab and sleepy students during the day. The latter also meant he had to rein in his gift during lectures, or he'd get even sleepier than he'd already been and possibly fall asleep, setting a very bad example for his students..

And the evening just kept getting better, if he were to judge from tall, dark and handsome leaning over him by the bar - maybe a little too familiar with so sense of personal space, but Charles could feel the buzz of alcohol from him and it wasn't as if he was sober himself. Besides, Charles loved physical contact like this, hot, hard and with intent. It didn't hurt that the guy's mind, even through the haze of alcohol, felt almost unnaturally ordered and the only things slipping to the forefront where Charles couldn't help but pick them up, were the most indecent ideas -- all involving Charles.

All in all, Charles would count the night a roaring success. Especially when the man - "Call me Max." - happily followed him through the streets of Oxford to the flat Charles lived in.

They staggered through Charles' flat, tearing at each other's clothes, messily kissing. Charles felt like he was getting dragged further into Max's lovely mind while he more than happy to let the other man push him down onto the mattress.

Losing himself to the feeling of his own arousal mixing with Max's, Charles arched his back, digging his fingers into Max's shoulder blades. The blast of Max's release nearly tore him along, but Charles wanted to make it last, wanted to enjoy the moment.

He pushed at the heavy shoulder and laughed, then stopped, blinking rapidly to clear his head, of both alcohol and aching arousal. "Max?" He reached out with his mind as well and found nothing but a contented ...sleeping pattern. "Max? You selfish, lazy bloody bastard! You utter ...wank-stain!"

There was no reaction and Charles braced himself and pushed Max off him and to the side. Before finishing himself off and vindictively wiping his hand in Max's shirt that they hadn't even managed to get off. With a put upon sigh he cleaned himself up and lay down with his back to his 'guest'. Well, the night had started out well enough, so it was no surprise that it had gone downhill from there. Although Charles had never had a bed partner fall asleep on him before - literally. 

He considered for a moment forcing the other man up and out of bed, but he'd probably have to resort to his gift to do so - and that wasn't his style.

\---♦♦♦---

Erik walked down another street, getting closer to admitting that he was lost. He knew where magnetic north was, but every other street of Oxford looked identical to his hungover mind. The thermo of coffee he'd woken up to had been lovely, but there'd been no sign of his bed partner. Erik couldn't remember much past the fact that he'd gone home with a gorgeous guy in a pair of tight jeans and an even tighter t-shirt -- and Emma was going to have his head for that. Erik stepped aside as the crowds grew denser. He had to get out of the throng of people. Erik was glad that he'd stepped close to the wall. Emma's anger laced with worry nearly made him stumble when it hit his mind _hard_ and he resigned himself to the tirade he would be facing as Azazel popped into existence right in front of him, making people jump aside in surprise. He could have done without the knowing smirk on the man's face as he took in Erik's appearance.

"Emma wants to skin you alive, comrade" Azazel happily shared with him.

"I know," Erik said miserably.

"Why didn't you call and tell her where you were?" Azazel asked curiously, as he put his hand on Erik's shoulder.

"I woke up in a bed alone and I got lost when I left the place," Erik admitted, rubbing his eyes, well aware of what a sorry excuse of a man he made that very moment.

Azazel laughing as he pulled them into the void of teleportation didn't help his hangover. Nor did the vertigo.

\---♦♦♦---

Charles turned to the projector and checked the information displayed one more time. The advanced class on genetics was coming to an end and the Dean had asked him to meet with some dignitaries from Genosha, who were apparently on the lookout for for staff for their newly opened university. And of course they would prefer mutants. Charles wasn't entirely sure how he felt about that. It smacked of isolationism, like the island state was trying to separate itself from the rest of the world while the world was very much doing the same.

Shrugging internally, he focused on his lecture again. He wasn't a politician and besides, he was happily tenured in Oxford. And somehow he doubted they'd be looking for a geneticist. He tended to get the distrustful attitude from fellow mutants - if not for his chosen field, then for his gift.

He was well aware of the guests entering the auditorium, but he blocked them out. He still had about ten minutes left of the lecture.

Or rather, he'd intended to block them out, right up until the moment he recognized one of the minds and nearly stopped mid-sentence. It was a testament to his well prepared lecture that he barely stumbled outwardly.

And where he'd been amenable towards his guests a moment earlier, he now loathed to see his one night stand again - if he could even call it that. It still smarted that there's been no note, no contact when he'd gotten back from the lab on the Saturday morning. Granted, he'd only managed to pour the rest of his coffee into a thermos for his guest (which was more than he deserved), and then run out of the door as his research assistant had called and rambled on about a minor fire in the lab.

The fire had turned out to be nothing but a burning rubbish bin and when Charles had made it back to his flat an hour later, his guest had gone. Coffee'd been drunk and no message of any kind left behind for him.

Now the bastard was standing in the dark back of the auditorium, with two other people - one clearly a telepath while the other had a more slippery mind and Charles was too well mannered to go digging for information. The third was obviously Max. Charles steeled himself and pulled up mental walls coated in ice. If Max was part of the Genoshan envoy, then Charles didn't want his associate to dig around in _his_ head.

Wrapping up the lecture, Charles sent his students on the way with the following week's assignment. The he drew a deep breath as they filed out, turning away and ignoring the three people walking down the stairs towards where he was tidying up his notes and putting the projector away while his laptop shut down.

"Professor Xavier?"

Charles breathed in deeply, then turned around, plastering a completely fake smile on his face. The woman who'd spoken was tall and lovely, radiating a quiet authority, while her red skinned companion peaked Charles' interest. Much to his amusement the man smirked at him and gave a small nod.

And Max… looked even more edible today than Charles remembered him. Tall, lean, a waist that Charles knew exactly what felt like under his hands.

"Yes?" Charles finally replied, keeping his walls up high.

"I'm Emma Frost," she said, holding out a gloved hand - white as the rest of her business suit. "These two gentlemen are my associates, Azazel and…" she paused. Then frowned.

Charles realized he might have leaked a little loathing when she'd been about to introduce Max.

"Erik Lehnsherr," she said, a slow smile forming on her lips. "But I think perhaps you've already met?"

Max… no, Erik, looked completely stricken, white faced except the slowly spreading flush over his lovely, high cheekbones.

Miss Frost narrowed her eyes, but then smiled congenially enough. "I will not mince words, Professor Xavier," she said. "We are looking for people who would be assets to our growing educational system on Genosha, and quite frankly, you would be the crowning jewel."

Charles blinked in surprise for a moment. "I'm…," he trailed off. "I'm flattered, and please, call me Charles. But why me? I rarely meet mutants who find geneticists worth their time."

Frost shook her head. "Charles, please, call me Emma," she replied, "and as for mutants and genetics, we can not really escape where we come from, no matter how much some of our people would like that." The last was aimed with some acid at Erik, who winced.

He was still staring rather unabashedly at Charles, who was torn between unease and annoyance still. So he chose to focus on Emma instead.

"And quite frankly, I've read your papers on general changes in the standard school system to accommodate the gifted from an early age," she said with more sincere smile.

Charles had had this conversation with mutants before and he smirked, trying to ignore the mixture of want and embarrassment coming off Erik. "I hope you are aware that this training and schooling would be for the benefit of the children and not to train an army."

Emma looked suitably contrite. "I am well aware that Shaw contacted you some years ago - trust me when I say that when we ...exposed him - we disposed of that attitude as well."

Charles gave her a hard look. He was well aware of Shaw having been removed from power and anyone would be less of an extremist than he'd been. It did, however, not mean that a successor would be any less dangerous.

Erik opened his mouth to say something, but he looked surprised when nothing came out, then shot Emma a sour look.

It was obvious to Charles that they had an entire conversation going on telepathically, and he caught the widening smirk on Azazel's face as the man quirked an eyebrow at him. _'Is it always like this?'_ Charles projected to him.

Azazel's grin widened. _'Da. They don't always agree, but they make a good team - balance each other out.'_

"Is there any way we can convince you that we are honest about his," Emma asked Charles. "That we have the best interest of our people in mind."

"I would like to try to change the system of the outside world before being locked away on Genosha," Charles said slowly.

"We could easily support lobbying outside Genosha for you," Emma replied quickly. "In many ways that would be the sensible and logical thing to do."

"The more enlightened the crowds are, the less they fear us," Charles agreed.

"I have walked your Oxford," Azazel said quietly. "People stare…"

"But they don't fear you," Charles cut in - he'd witnessed much the same the year before when Raven had visited him. He was more than a little proud to live in a place where people seemed a lot more laid back about mutants. The only thing the city disliked in general were drunk students - but that didn't really fall into his field of study.

Azazel nodded in agreement.

"What's your price?" Emma asked curiously. "Is there anyway we could tempt you into simply considering it - if not for good, then for a few terms?"

Charles' interest was peaked. He had to admit to that. To be able to influence a new school system in a young nation like Genosha… However, he might like Emma and Azazel, but if he had to deal with Erik… He could still feel the interested looks Erik was giving him, even if the man had stopped trying to speak. Charles figured that Emma had muzzled him - possibly to avoid him stepping in it.

More than he'd already done.

"It may sound strange," he began, but Emma waved him on. Straightening his stance, Charles carried on. "I want an apology from Mr. Lehnsherr." 

Emma's eyebrow went up, but she didn't comment.

Charles met Erik's eyes, and the tentative smile he got there slowly withered when Charles refused to smile back. "An apology - and wooing." He figured he'd earned it. And he'd like to see how far they were willing to go. How far Erik was willing to go. And because Charles was both genuinely interested to see if it _had_ only been a one night stand and found it morbidly funny to make Erik pay.

"What the hell?" Emma said, before she could stop herself. She turned to Erik. "What did you do?"

Before Erik could answer, Charles carried on. "I was enjoying myself Friday night - and he fell asleep in the middle of it." He glared at Erik. "I'm interested in your offer, but I won't consider taking it before I feel I've been given my due - there is no way I can work with someone who fell asleep on top of me, leaving me hanging."

"But," Erik said. Apparently Emma had loosened her hold on his tongue.

Emma stared at Erik, then a small grin widened on her face. "You fell asleep in the middle of having sex with..." she gestured at Charles. "Really, Erik I know I occasionally refer to you 'idiot' but this takes the prize."

"I didn't!" Erik said indignantly.

"You really did," Charles said drily, taking a mean delight in watching Erik blanch and squirm. "I had to finish myself off - and I even left you coffee in the morning."

"You're an idiot," Emma repeated. "And you will grovel, you will woo the professor and you will convince him you're not the asshole you've been so far."

Erik cast her a mutinous look, then turned to Charles and for the first time since they'd arrived, he looked unsure of himself.

"Pick me up at 8PM," Charles cut him off before he could open his mouth - not because he felt sorry for him, but because… well, Charles wasn't sure if he had a better reason than wanting to actually hit than and hit it _hard_ \- and actually get to finish this time. "Dress nicely, book us a table at a nice restaurant - ask the concierge of your hotel if you don't know what's good." He felt some of his earlier annoyance lessen. _'And afterwards I very much look forward to seeing you grovel - on you knees,'_ he couldn't help but add, taking an almost unholy pleasure in watching Erik squirm, the man looking like he was seriously considering going to his knees right away.

Maybe his Friday night hadn't been a complete waste of time after all.


End file.
